DF Session 28 Sept 07

Yesterday we had our 6th DF session. We were celebrating the birthdays of Eileen, Cheryl, Sai Kit & Edy. The songs we sang reminds me of some problems that I was having. I started to get drunk and got veri emotional & upset. Went out a few times to cry cause I promise that I will not cry in the room. It was suppose to be a night of celebration but I was actually the one who spoilt the mood. After that, Cheryl also started to get upset and also drunk too. I could feel that some of us were not enjoying the session. Lucky my frens were there to console me and give me their support. I must really apologise to all the DF members for spoiling the mood for this session. I promise that I won't do it again. Anyway I have resolved my problems. The song in my earlier post would best describe my feelings & problems faced. I have finally learnt to let go of what was not meant to be mine. The person who tied the knots have helped me untied them and I can now move on with my life. Though I am still a bit upset but I am really glad to know that I have a group of frens who are veri supportive. Cheryl, Sharol, Kai Ee & Abby, THANK YOU SO MUCH for being there when I needed a shoulder to cry on and someone to talk to even though you dun know what exactly was happening. Thank you for understanding and not asking. Some things are meant to be kept a secret forever. I truly treasure the memories & friendship from all my frens. To ALL my frens out there, thank you for choosing me to be your fren.

DF members, I am realli SORRY for spoiling your night. Really hope that you will not give up on coming for our future DF sessions and I promise the next one will be a better one.

罗志祥 --好朋友

像两首节拍不同的歌
却又同时被爱情合奏
旋律勉强着
愉快不能够假装快乐
你心中有宽阔的天空
等空气还稀薄
曾经等待因为会改变什么
你总会属于我
但是最后时间证明了
你只喜欢我
你说我比较像你的好朋友
只是不小心拥抱着
你道歉 你难过
于是我给你笑容
谁在乎我的心
还会不会寂寞
如果爱情是五线谱
我只希望用全音符
吟唱出爱上你
那完整的幸福
当你的心没有耳朵
即使我为你唱这歌
你也只看见我哭了
你说我比较像你的好朋友
只是不小心拥抱着
你道歉 你难过
于是我给你笑容
谁在乎我的心还会不会寂寞

Touching???

"在世间最遥远的距离,不是我站在你面前却不知道我爱你，而是明明知道彼此相爱却不能在一起"
A fren send me this phrase via msn and told me its veri touching. I think its touching too lah but dun realli apply to me cause think the guy dun love me lor. I realli dun know leh.

Snow White & Aurora's Birthdays

Today we went out to celebrate the birthdays of Snow White & Aurora. Went to White Bar and when I reached there, Aurora oredi ordered a bottle of Chivas. Though thats my favourite alcohol but I only had 2 glasses cause got to keep my record clean for Friday. I will drink to my heart's content on Friday but not get too drunk lah cause I promise my frens that I still be awake at 12am to go dancing with them. Lucky got a fren who is kind enough to send me home every time. Anyway really look forward to our monthly DF session on this coming Friday......(^o^)

Mid Autumn Festival

I didn't really understand why one of my fren is afraid of spending special occasions like birthdays or christmas after she broke up with her boyfriend. Now i do cause I felt lonely today too even though its only Mid Autumn festival. Maybe on this special day you are suppose to have a reunion with your family or partners but I had to spend it in the office. I do know that I have lots of frens out there but there is afterall a difference. I suddenly missed him leh, not that I still love him but we have together for 3yrs. Wonder how is he? Call me a coward but I really didn't have the courage to contact him after we broke up. I really hope he is getting along fine. I am sure he will live a better life without me.

Though there is someone in my heart now but sooner or later I will have to let go cause he is not meant to be mine.
把手放开不问一句Say Goodbye
当作最后一次对你的溺爱
冷冷清清淡淡今后都不管
只要你能愉快
Anyway my resolutions moving forward:
1) To live a better life
2) Concentrate & do well in work
3) To find someone whom i love and also love me

Compatible Sign

Compatible Signs: Aries, Saggi and Leo

Haha, got this from YY's blog. He is really good with analysing the horoscopes. Actually he is quite right lah cause my ex-bf is a Saggi. We didn't really have any major problems except communications. Maybe I should start to look for a Leo bf next to test the accuracy of his analysis.

LS Day

Dun know what I ate yesterday that caused me to have diarrhoea today. Been in & out of the toilet since this morning. Feeling very weak now. I think its the curry fish head that I had yesterday. Had tummy ache when I went out to get Eileen's birthday cake. Tummy ache again when I was having lunch with Beng. So paiseh that we got to finish lunch fast and then go back to office cause I need to go toilet lah. Hope I can survive till end of the day.

Busy Saturday

Woke up at about 1pm today as I haven been sleeping well for the past week. Weekend is always the time that I can sleep as late I want. Need to go back to the office today as I got to print some stuff for Mid Autumn Festival decoration on monday. Managed to complete doing them at about 6.30pm. Went down to Orchard to meet Sharol who went with me to shop for Cheryl's birthday present. Met up with Cheryl later to shop for Eileen's present. We finished at about 10pm and Sharol suggested that we go sing ktv. We went to Partyworld at International Building and sang till about 2am. We were practising songs for our next DF session on this coming Friday. DF members, watch out cause we have oredi compiled a list of songs we are going to sing.

Ice Wine

Yesterday, went drinking with some frens at Winebos to pre celebrate Eileen's birthday. It was a fun night as I had the opportunity to get to know some of frens better. I get to know frens like Serene, Yuk Fong & Adeline better. They can be veri fun to be with when they want to. I am not really a person who like to drink wine but yesterday, Edy introduced me to this wine called Ice Wine. He oredi told me that I would like it cause its sweet and true enough, I like the taste of it. Most of frens didn't like it cause its veri sweet but I was the only one who enjoy it. I drank almost half a bottle of Ice Wine. Left at about 11.30pm cause as usual, I got be home by 12am so that my mom won't nag at me. Why am I the only one who still got a curfew to meet. I am oredi 30 yrs old. Why can't she leave me alone to do what I like? Maybe she just want to control me like I am her pet lor. Sometimes I really feel like a bird locked in a cage. I only get my freedom when I am at work. That explains why sometimes I rather stay in the office to work till late than go back and face my "master". How to find a new boyfriend when I don't even have the freedom I need. So sad......

Nothing is Forever

"Nothing is forever. Not everything has an outcome or result, so just cherish whatever you have had."
Something that I saw from the newspaper today and thought it is pretty meaningful

Mooncake

Thought I will feel lost today but no leh, I managed to concentrate on my work today. I was busy preparing for the dept meeting today. An hour before the meeting starts, I spoke to my boss about using the money from Housekeeping Day to buy some mooncakes for the staff to eat during the meeting and she immeidately sent a few of us to go buy. We bought traditional mooncake from Goodwood Park & The Regent as well as Snow Skin ones from The Regent & Marina Mandarin.

When we were keeping the mooncakes in the fridge after the meeting, we saw a bottle of wine in there and decided to ask for permission from my boss to open it to drink since it may have turn bad after bring kept in there for so long. Me, Kai Ee, Lay Bee, Edy & Beng finished the bottle of wine. We sat there sipping wine and talking rubbish. Haha think they may kill me if they see this blog. It was a pretty good night and I enjoyed their company. Must really say a BIG thank you to them for cheering me up tonight. Arigato.....

Crazy Day

Haha, I am still a bit crazy today. Feelings still veri sensitive. Good thing is that some of my colleagues went to buy donuts from the famous Donut Factory and they were kind enough to give me 2 pieces of my favourite Apple Cinnamon donut to enjoy. Yummy, they really taste good and I was just having craving for the donuts over last weekend. They were so lucky cause they didn't really queue as long as I did to buy the donuts lor.

Really dun know how long I can survive from my current situation. I have been behaving pretty odd nowadays. Talk back to my boss like nobody's business. Get easily irritated over veri minor things. Not too sure if this is mid life crisis. Maybe all woman who are single and reach the age 30 behaves like this, haha. Although I am still the Jenny who always look on the bright side of things but I have been getting pretty negative at times. Well, must really jiayou before my boss gets angry with me and decides to fire me. haha

Today I actually wanted to stay in the office and finish my work although some of my frens were going drinking. Maybe because I was upset with some stuff so decided to join them for a drink at about 8.30pm. I didn't really like beer lah but no choice lor, needed a drink to cool myself down. My choice was right cause I had lots of fun chatting with my frens and also learning to "flirt" with this guy fren. My frens cannot stand our "flirting", they think it is not my style lah. Anyway its was just for fun, we didn't mean it lor. Did feel better after the drink. Oh no, hope I am not becoming an alcoholic. I have a fren who even call me a cheongster lor. Me think I am a bit old to cheong lah and also I still have curfew, cannot stay out too late anyway. Thats why some frens call me Cinderella-one who needs to be home by 12am. I have also written a list of songs I wanna sing at Dragonfly next week. Forgot to take it when I left the pub and had to trouble my frens to find and keep it for me. So paiseh.

Still staying up this late to write cause I needed to wait for hair to dry. Thats the problem when you have long rebonded hair. Cannot sleep till its dry.

等了又等 (Cantonese version)

Like to share with you a song I am listening to now. This song is from Jacky Cheung's musical Snow Wolf Lake cantonese version. I fell in love with this song when I heard it about 7 years while watching the musical. Guess this song can best describe my feelings at this moment.

但愿栽花可以忘掉伤感
季节变迁了 始终不改我心　　
但愿你未在人生中消失　　
抹掉眼泪为你再等　　
时日秒秒细致像尘　　
仍为你记录了在何年何月与日　　
曾是爱过便叫人兴奋　　
纵让折磨的心 等了又等　　
爱着你 挂念你 渴望你前来和我接近　　
花也哭 花亦笑 似在说 无望也不要紧　　
我愿意 有日会 一觉苏醒这梦会变真　　
你若有日回来 重生多可爱　　
盼为我亲这心 深深去吻　　

Tired Day

Today is a tiring day for me. Maybe because I have been on msn & surfing internet till late at night for the past few days. Guess when your body is tired due to lack of sleep, your mind tend to be also very tired. I feel that I am emotionally weak nowadays. I get upset easily. Where is all my strength? Why is it that I can always give good advise to frens on their problems but cannot help myself. I am really lost.......Hope to have the strong Jenny back soon......

Frizzy Hair

I am not suppose to wash my hair for 2 days but I couldn't tahan so rinse it today. Now my hair ends looks super frizzy. So sad. My shiny hair gonez only after 1 day. My colleagues were praising my new hair style today. Tomorrow no more black & shiny hair oredi. So upset.....sob sob.....

New Hair Style

Went to straighten my hair today! My hair looked so long when they just finished straightening it for me. Had to trim it shorter cause of the damaged ends. My mom said I look better in straight hair. Well, I may consider cutting it short in few months time if i get sick of this length.

Sony VAIO

Got my new laptop on Friday. Its a PINK Sony VAIO. A fren sold it to me for $1700 cause she needed to buy a MacBook. Finally got my own computer and now busy personalising it with new wallpapers. Oredi changed it to my favourite Hello Kitty wallpaper. Was also busy logging in to msn and chatting with frens. Chatted with a fren till about 2am last night. Now with another fren. This is really interesting & cool. Now I can access to Internet as and when I like and not depend on my dad's one.

Hong Kong Trip

Went the NATAs fair today to book my Hong Kong trip. Found a pretty good deal there. I went to New Shan Travel (the agency which I always book my HK trips). The 5D4N package cost me only $684 flying by United Airlines and staying at Largos Hotel (formerly known as Mayfair Garden or Dorsett Garden). Even the staff at HK Toursim Board say its a cheap & good deal when they saw my booking. I was quoted $714 when I called the agency few days ago. Lucky I went down to NATAs to book. I must start to plan my itinerary soon. Just saw from Monday magazine today that I.T has opened a super big factory outlet. That will be a must go place for me. This time must also try new food places. Time to update my Hong Kong manual & map so that my frens can also get the new updates. Maybe i should set up a website to share my experiences and knowledge bout Hong Kong.

Hangover & Sick

Went to the Chivas party with some friends last night cause got free flow of Chivas from 9-10pm. Thought since its free, might as well drink as much as I can. The drinks they gave us were really strong. I didn't know that the effect will only come an hour later. I had about 5 glasses and I really knock out. I was lying there sleeping from about 10pm to 12am. Went to toilet to vomit a few times and couldn't even stand properly. I even fell in the toilet and got my white pants really dirty. Got myself really drunk this time and the feeling sucks. Never been in such a bad state before. I was still drunk when I went home and got a earful from my mom. Woke up this morning thinking that I am ok and went to work. Reach the office and started to feel nausea & sick in the stomach. Went to see the doctor and was told that I am down with urine infection, thought it was alcohol infection. Was given an MC but couldn't go home cause gotta pick up laptop from friend tonight. Anyway I also dun want my mom to nag at me again lor. She probably nag at me if she finds out that I got sick after drinking. Think I really drink too much this round lah. Lesson learnt: never drink so much again (even if its free) cause it really feels terrible when you get drunk.

Love is about Compromising & Communication

Finally told my mom about my break up with Stephen last night and just as I expected, she is quite supportive of my decision although she also think that it is a bit wasted to let go of such a nice man. She did tell me off for not giving him enough time to prepare for the break up.

I also told my boss Alicia about it yesterday afternoon and guess what, she was not surprised and even told me that she sort of guessed it. She even could tell that I have been having problems for the last 6months. My boss is really an amazing woman. Well, she did asked me to really consider my decision again as she also felt that Stephen is a man I shouldn't give up easily. She also shared with me on how she managed her relationship with her husband despite her busy work schedule. I must say that she is very lucky to have such a great husband. She also told me that love is about compromising with each other. I totally agreed with her but I couldn't really tell what was the main reason for the break up. Told her I will think thoroughly again on my decision.

What I gathered from my session with her is that "Love is about Compromising & Communication". If you cannot compromise & communication with each other, there is no point continuing the relationship. Always treasure every moment you have with your love ones cause you never know when the time will come when you don't love him/her anymore. Never give up if you truly love the person. It doesn't matter how much time you spent together so long you enjoy and treasure every moment of it. You dun have to own certain things to be happy.

Sooo Tired

Stayed in the office till 11pm yesterday to wait for the migration to complete. I am sooo tired now. I get very short tempered when I dun get enough sleep. Some of my poor colleagues have been getting it from me for these 2 days cause I haven got enough sleep.

KL Trip 7-9 Sept 07

Still working in the office at this hour cause doing some system migration. Might as take this time to share about my KL trip.

On 7 Sept, we set off for our KL trip at about 2.30pm after lunch at Raffles Place BK. Me, Cheryl & Siew Kean took Sai Kit's car & Sharol, Eileen & YY in Mycle's car. It was pretty fun taking Sai Kit's car cause he is a fast & safe driver. We stopped over for A&W halfway through our journey for tea break. Manage to reach KL at about 6pm and reach the hotel at about 7pm. Mr Lim came to the hotel to bring us out for dinner. As there was a heavy traffic jam around our hotel area, he decided to bring us to Jalan Alor for dinner. Anyway that is a food street with lots of yummy food. We had oyster pancake, satay, fried mushroom, bbq chicken wings etc. We were halfway through dinner when it started to drizzle so we had to quickly finish the food and make our way back. After dinner, we decided to go to Red Box KTV located at Low Yat Plaza. We sang till about 2am before making our way back to the hotel. The ktv cost us about M$400.00 for 8 pax.

As we were all super tired, we decided to skip bfast the next day. We gathered at 11am to make our way to 1 Utama for our shopping. Had our lunch there. We shopped around till about 5pm. I bought 2 caps, a pair of shoes & a top. Guess everyone is super tired especially Cheryl who is not feeling well. We decided to skip the ferris wheel & chinatown which we initially planned to go. Mr Lim came to brought us out for dinner. Went to this small restaurant which good & cheap. After dinner, he brought us to Bangsa which is place similar to our Holland Village. There are lots of pubs and also small boutiques. Its was a bit late when we reach there and some of the shops were already closed. But still we manage to shop a little. I bought a Burberry t-shirt (suppose to be factory reject lah) ,a non-authentic Coach wristlet and a pair of shoes from Zara. Finished the day with a drink with Mr Lim at one of the pubs. Reach hotel at about 12am and we still went out to Jalan Alor to buy supper. We had Ramly burger & penang fried kway teow.

On Sunday, we gathered at about 10.30am to check out of the hotel first before proceeding to Bukit Bintang for our shopping. Had lunch at this place called Nandos which was highly recommended by Sai Kit. The food is pretty good and reasonably priced. After lunch, we proceed to Sungei Wang for shopping. I had to change more M$ as I had finished spending those I brought. Bought quite a bit of stuff from Sungei Wang and I quite like the place. Definitely better than 1 Utama. Finished our shopping at 3pm and made our way to pick up the cars to leave KL. Reached JB at about 7.30pm and went to Holiday Plaza to get some snacks for office colleagues as well as had our dinner at Pizza Hut. By the time we finished dinner, its was already 9pm. Cleared the S'pore immigration at about 11pm. I reached home at 12am cause Sai Kit send Cheryl & Eileen home first.

My total damage for this trip is about S$500.00. Though I spent alot of money but I have enjoyed this trip with this group of frens. Although Cheryl & Eileen was not feeling very well but they still made the effort to join us.

Last but not the least, must say a BIG THANK YOU to the following people:
- our 2 drivers SAI KIT & MYCLE as well as their Xiao Hong & Xiao Hei for bringing us safely to KL & back home.
- Mr Lim for buying us yummy dinners.
- Siew Kean for bringing us shopping.
- Cheryl (aka Sleeping Beauty) & Eileen (aka Snow White) for shopping with us even though they are sick & tired.
- YY for continuing to share with us his cold jokes during the journey.
- Sharol (aka Belle) for her fun & laughter.
- Sai Kit for shopping around with me and being my fashion consultant.

Am definitely looking forward to next trip with the DF club members.

纯真

长长的路上我想我们是朋友
如果有期待我想最好是不说
你总是微笑的你总是不开口
世界被你掌握
月亮绕地球地球绕着太阳走
我以为世界是座宁静的宇宙
今晚的天空有一颗流星划过
在预言着什麽
在无声之中你拉起了我的手
我怎麽感觉整个黑夜在震动
耳朵里我听到了心跳的节奏
星星在闪烁 你怎麽说
你心中一定有座浓雾的湖泊
任凭月光再皎洁照也照不透
你眼中闪烁湖面无边的温柔
那波光在诱惑
在无声之中你拉起了我的手
我怎麽感觉整个黑夜在震动
耳朵里我听到了心跳的节奏
星星在闪烁 你会怎麽说
在无声之中你拉起了我的手
我怎麽感觉整个黑夜在震动
耳朵里我听到了心跳的节奏
星星在闪烁 你会怎麽说
你已经有他就不应该再有我
世界的纯真此刻为你有迷惑
我想我应该轻轻放开你的手
我却没有力气这麽做

Excited

I am so excited cause me and a group of frens are going to KL tomorrow. Haven been there for about 1.5years. Heard that there are lots of new shopping centres there. Really hope that we will enjoy this short trip. Will share on my trip when I am back.

Confused

I am getting very confused recently. Don't know what's wrong with me leh. Sometimes I really don't know the things I do are right or wrong. I am worried that one day I might regret on the many decisions I made recently. I wonder why we have to make so many difficult decisions in life. Why can't we just live each day happily and don't have to worry so much. Well, jus to share the chorus of a song that I like:

其实还爱你
其实我非常爱
你不想失去你
难道我没有权利
说我不愿意
你给了他的吻
虽然却只有一吻
可知道我渴望抓到你的心
我知道他很爱你
你怕他伤心
我每天假装开心
害怕你离去
可不可以任性
求求你不要去
总在我心里最后一句
其实很爱你.

Boring Saturday

Must say that I am pretty lucky cause I got free transport home after picking up the dictionaries at Kino Taka yesterday. Had dinner with Abby, her husband Philip & Chery at a Japanese rest near Gallery Hotel. Can't remember what is the name. Anyway, due to some incident, Philip end up sending me home which I must really thank him for it cause they stay in Jurong leh.

I had to wake at about 6.15am this morning cause got to attend a writing workshop at Alex. Though I have attended the workshop before but since I have to be there to handle the logistics, might as well attend the workshop. Was there at about 8am to help the trainer Jean on the logistics. She is really a PAIN. She was ordering us around and insisted on alot of things. Me & Kai Ee was so fustrated with her till we had to get out of the room in order not to tell her off. Anyway the course was almost 90% the same as the one I had attended. Seems like she never made the effort to modify it since the time I attended in Apr 2005. Not very impressive leh. Well, I jus treat as a refresher course lor. Some of the stuff she taught can be pretty useful. Started feeling super sleepy at about 4pm and the workshop will only end bout 6pm. The last 2hrs were so difficult to pass. Finally survived till 6pm. Lucky for me, a fren was going to Pasir Ris so he gave me a lift home. Managed to reach home at bout 7pm to catch a nap.

I have decided to buy Chery's Sony Vaio notebook. She agreed to sell me at $1.9k. Me think its a pretty good buy lah and I simply cannot resist the offer cause its a PINK one. I just love pink and since its within my budget, might as well buy from her. Can't wait to get it from her and I will have my own computer soon. Can start downloading lots of stuff and also maybe learn how to use msn. Frens laugh at me when I tell them that I have never used msn.

Felt a bit empty & lonely during weekends since my breakup with my ex-bf. I know that I can date some of my frens out but do not want to disturb them during weekends lah, they also have other commitments. Anyway, next weekend I am going to KL so its occupied. I am also planning to go HK end of this year. Have also decided to go to Tokyo with Cat & Chery in Apr 08. I really miss going to Tokyo. Will have to shelf my plans for Taipei since no frens are free or interested to go with me. Can still go if got frens wanna go lor.